| Trophy | How to unlock | Type
|
|---|
| A Kissenger For All Seasons | Get kissed by an unhygienic individual on two separate occasions | Silver
|
| Above And Beyond The Spider of Duty | Collect all 8 spiders in the restaurant | Bronze
|
| Around The World In 80 Puns | Visit all travel destinations in the world | Silver
|
| Bloody Mary On The Rocks | Serve a bloody mary | Gold
|
| Breaking The Mold | Consume vast quantities of jelly to fulfill ethical responsibilities | Silver
|
| But She Can Fly... | Win a round of pillow fight | Gold
|
| Clean As A Whistle | Find and utilize a bidet | Bronze
|
| Conversationalist | Talk to 3 inanimate cardboard boxes | Bronze
|
| Data mole | Smuggle a carrier pigeon into the next level | Silver
|
| DJ Polyblank | Scratch two compact disc records | Silver
|
| Don't Get Involved | Kiss 3 people while wearing lipstick | Bronze
|
| Essense of Pigeon | Spray 3 people with pheromones | Gold
|
| Exume To Consume | Discovered all of the artifacts buried in sand | Gold
|
| Face Infectors | Defeat a microscopic squadron of bacteriophage | Silver
|
| Hasselhoff In A Pinch | Rescue the drowning man in the swimming pool | Silver
|
| Heroine Chic | Apply lipstick VERY generously to your face | Gold
|
| Insurance Premiums Increase | Shatter all vases in the shop | Gold
|
| Jacques Voyeur: Room Explorer | Explore other guest rooms at the resort | Bronze
|
| Long Distance Charges | Explore the rotary phone menu options | Bronze
|
| Polyplegic | Land awkwardly while diving at the pool | Bronze
|
| Saliva Surrogate | Assist a saliva deficient individual by fulfilling their stationary needs | Bronze
|
| Serious Degaussing Skills | Degauss 4 undercover agents in the park | Bronze
|
| Spongliform Encephalopathy | Consume one brain steeped sandwich | Silver
|
| The End | Now go outside | Platinum
|
| Verbal Morality Statute | Dial various four letter words into the Nippon Telnet phone terminal | Gold
|
